Dating Apps Are Failing at the One Thing They Promised

Falling in love used to sound romantic. Now it sounds like an unpaid internship. It started with the promise of more options and fewer awkward moments. Now it feels like a slot machine where your self-worth is the currency. A new survey from Tawkify confirms what a lot of people already know: dating apps are exhausting.

Nearly half of users report feeling emotionally drained. It’s hours of swiping, one match that says “hey,” and then nothing. But for some reason, we keep coming back like it’s going to be different this time. On average, users delete and re-download dating apps six times a year, which sounds a lot like a toxic relationship.

Maybe the worst part is what all that swiping does to your brain. Over one-third of people say the apps make them feel worse about themselves. You start to internalize the indifference, the silence, the parade of one-word openers. You start to wonder if love’s just an algorithm you haven’t cracked. Meanwhile, 14% of users admit they’re only on the apps for an ego boost, and 10% say they open them just to feel better. Which means even when it’s not about finding love, it’s still a dopamine game.

People Are Ditching Dating Apps—Here’s Why

But not everyone’s opting in anymore. This summer, nearly half of users say they plan to take a break, to actually try meeting people in person. Friends, family, social events. Places where eye contact still counts and you don’t need to worry about whether your last photo is too “thirsty.” For some, it’s less about nostalgia and more about sanity. Even people who believe in modern dating are starting to admit that apps don’t always feel like a shortcut. Sometimes they just feel like a trap.

What’s clear is that people still want connection. They’re just tired of chasing it through a touchscreen. You think the problem is them. Then it hits you—you’ve been so busy trying to be someone’s type, you forgot to check if they’re even yours.

So if you’re thinking about closing the apps and reclaiming your peace, you’re far from alone. Swiping might be the norm, but for more and more people, it’s not the goal.